Tag Archive: Acts

Fighting Through Pain

Dearly beloved: May GOD’s peace, mercy, love, joy, and healing grace be ever upon you. Pain, it is the most difficult of all our emotions. It is also the most destructive. If left to fester, it leads to hate, anger and sadness. If we do not control it, it makes us depressed and causes us to lash out. As a convict in a supermax prison, I am living in a house of pain. I myself sometimes suffer from it. It is very easy to fall into despair when you are serving a life sentence for crimes you did not commit. Satan loves to kick us when we are down. He often tries to plant doubt in my head. He tells me there is no use in fighting for my freedom or seeking justice. He tells me that I am worthless and hopeless. He tells me that no matter what I do I will die in here. He tells me that nobody cares about a colored ex-drug dealer and alcoholic. He tells me that I am a failure and. a loser who is washed up. He says I am nothing more than a waste of talent and no one will take pity on me or believe in me. I am not going to lie to you. Even as a man of faith, sometimes I want to give up and believe his dirty lies. There are times when my family is not able to visit me for months. During those times I often break down and cry. I sleep all day unable to get out of bed. A lot of you know exactly what I am talking about. Don’t you? Don’t you just want to give up and die sometimes? You see, we may not be in the same boat, but we are all traveling on a turbulent river called life. We can relate on many levels. You know what I do at my lowest points? I pray and read my bible and sometimes I feel instant joy, but other times it takes me a while to come out of my funk. This situation hurts and at times it feels hopeless.

Because of my disgusting choice to sell drugs I understand that most of society has no mercy for me nor love. I am not that man anymore and even when I was, I would not ever kill another human being. Even in defense of my life, I don’t know that I could. Of course, the argument can be made that the poison I sold was killing people. I have so much remorse for the life I lived and the people I polluted. I imagine that the apostle Paul felt remorse for the death of Steven even though it was not caused by his hand. Yet GOD redeemed him as He is doing with me. Still, l imagine that Paul often struggled with pain. But, he fought through it. He never lost faith in GOD; not even when he was persecuted and unjustly put in prison. Even when he was viciously executed, he believed in GOD and he fought through the pain. I refuse to believe satan’s lies. I know that there are people out there in the world who believe in redemption. I know that my current situation is nothing more than a minor setback which is preparing me for a major comeback. I prayed and GOD told me to reach out for help. He inspired me to get the Justice4Randall facebook page created which my family maintains. Hallelujah! Praise GOD!

This is the first time throughout this entire five-plus years that I have reached out to others for help. I have been so focused on helping others and giving back to the people in need of GOD that I never thought of asking someone to help me. I owe so much for the pain that I caused by selling drugs, I didn’t dare ask for help. But GOD said, “Son, you are a Christian and it is okay to accept help from your brothers and sisters.” I am a part of the body of Christ. We Christians are family and families are supposed to stick together. So, I started the Justice4Randall facebook page in hopes of raising enough money to hire a law firm to fight for me. I have been shafted by two public defenders who were crooked. Because of my color and background, I have been made into a political tool used to frighten people into voting for certain politicians who promise to rid the state of Maine of “dangerous black men”. In fact, the lead prosecutor was promoted after my trial and is now favored to be the next attorney general. The current attorney general is running for governor. They are desperately trying to cover up what they did in my case and several others. When you are up against that kind of power and corruption, you can’t fight it alone. You need GOD and His children on your side. I refuse to die a political prisoner whose back was used as a step ladder for those who thirst and lust for power and fame. This is very painful, but we are gonna fight through this pain together.

I know that some of you out there are facing even worse trials than I right now. Well, I want you to know that you are not alone, not at all. I am here with you. More importantly, GOD is with you if you let Him in. I want you to write me and I promise to pray for you and offer you whatever help I am able to lend. You are a part of my redemption. I want to help you fight through your pain. I included a recent picture of myself at the top of this post. It is not one of my best. I was going through a lot at the time and had been in tears the night before. You can see how heavy and bloodshot my eyes are. My facial hair was black five years ago when this nightmare began and as you can see it is mostly grey now. You are probably wondering why I shared such an unflattering photo. Well, I want you to see my struggle. I want you to understand that you are not the only one suffering. We are in a spiritual battle. Sometimes that takes a toll on us.

If you look at my photo real carefully you can see a twinkle in my eye. That is the light of GOD within me. If you are reading this and you are unsaved, now is the time. Let GOD help you fight through your pain. He loves you and He wants to help you.
Please repeat the following prayer: “Dear Jesus, I know that because of my sin I need Your forgiveness. I believe that You died on the cross for my sins. I believe You rose again so I could live with You. I want to stop living for myself and start living for You. I want Your peace in my life. I want forgiveness for my sins. Please come into my heart and change my life. I want to live with You forever. I want You to be my Lord and Savior. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
If you said it and you meant it, then welcome to the family. We are now in this together. Please contact us and let us help you on this new path you have chosen.

That picture of me is on one of my low days when satan really attacks me hard. But, truth be told, I have far more good days than bad. You can ask anyone who knows me; I am at peace more often than not. That peace is from GOD. I want you to feel it too. I LOVE all of you and I thank you for your prayers and support.


May GOD bless and keep you! May you support others and in turn be supported! May you let GOD help you fight through the pain! Amen!
Love in Christ,
(A man who is letting GOD help him fight through the pain!)

Missed Opportunity

https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-person-school-head-455/Acts 13:47  For so the Lord has commanded us:  ‘I have set you as a light to the Gentiles, That you should be for salvation to the ends of the earth.’

Dearly Beloved:  May GOD’s grace, peace, courage, strength and LOVE be ever upon you.  This is a very sad time for me.  My eldest brother passed away on November 19th.  I did not find out until two days ago.  He had been estranged from the family.  I loved him very much, though I did not show it enough.  I deeply regret not getting to know him better.  We did not grow up together.  He was nearly twenty years older than I. In his youth, my father immigrated to Africa in search of a better life for his brothers and sisters.  His parents had both died, leaving him as the eldest sibling, to raise his brothers and sister.  It was there in Senegal, Africa where my eldest brother was born.  My brother was the spitting image of my father.  My father sired a large family in Africa before immigrating to America where myself and my two younger siblings were born.  My mother is a Caucasian-American.  My father worked very hard and saved his money.  Eventually, he earned enough to bring his African born children to America.  I remember meeting my older brothers for the first time.  I was five years old at the time.  I had stared at their pictures before they came.  Father told me lots of heart-warming stories about them.  They were like rock stars to me.  And when the day came where I finally got to meet them, I was so excited.  I remember teaching them English and playing with them for hours on end.  They were all musical prodigies.  They had been performing since they were knee high to a grasshopper.  I loved watching them perform.  They would practice for shows at my Dad’s house.  Those were great times. (more…)

I Am Just A Man

https://unsplash.com/photos/xz4KUoOElToActs 23:11-12  But the following night the Lord stood by him and said, “Be of good cheer, Paul; for as you have testified for Me in Jerusalem, so you must also bear witness at Rome.”  And when it was day, some of the Jews banded together and bound themselves under an oath, saying that they would neither eat nor drink till they had killed Paul.

Dearly Beloved,
May the peace, love, joy and grace of our Lord be ever upon you.  Times have been rough for me spiritually and emotionally lately.  I have been struggling with doubt – not of God, but of man.  Those of you who have been following my situation have heard that I have been wrongfully convicted of horrific and tragic crimes.  Race was injected into my trial.  I was stereotyped and mislabeled.  The prosecutors and police tampered with evidence and witnesses.  I filed for a mistrial and the courts stalled me for over a year.  Now, all of a sudden, they are rushing my appeal.  To my knowledge, they only rush an appeal when they intend to deny it.  Such usually happens when a person or persons with great political power pulls strings.  Now, I’m no martyr; nor am I seeking sympathy by claiming to be a victim.  The facts are the facts.  What took place during my trial was nothing short of a modern day lynching.  Questions like, what color the people are where I am from, had no relevance whatsoever.  They were posed solely to prejudice the jury.  The suggestion, that a white man wouldn’t need to carry a gun because he is white and around white people, is also clearly and undeniably racist and meant to prejudice the jury.  Yet, I was denied a motion for a mistrial and by the looks of it, I may be on the fast track to being railroaded on my appeal.  Notice I said, “by the looks of it.”  The truth is, I have no way of knowing what the outcome may be.  My fears, though based on experience, are not necessarily valid.

Now, you would think that after all that God has done for me, after the miracles I witnessed and prayers He has answered, that my faith would be bulletproof.  Paul actually witnessed and spoke to Christ, yet he continued to question the Lord.  Why, he doubted whether or not he would even live moment to moment.  The Lord constantly had to remind Paul that He was with him, that Paul had a purpose to fulfill and his time to die had not yet come.   (more…)

Sharing Is Caring

https://www.pexels.com/photo/christmas-xmas-snowman-snowglobe-21265/Acts 20:35  “I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’
Seasons Greetings, my beautiful brothers and sisters.  May the grace of God be upon you.  Amen.  I pray that all of you are well during this joyous time of year. This is the time of year when some Christians celebrate the birth of Christ our Lord.  Of course, it is unknown when Jesus was born.  Some speculate that it was in October.  Jesus never commanded us to celebrate His birth, only His death and resurrection.  Christmas trees, Santa Claus and mistletoe are all pagan traditions which were left over from the Roman empire.  I find it trivial to debate such things.  To me, Christmas should be celebrated every day, to some degree or another.  Most definitely, we should praise Jesus for His sacrifice infinitely.  His birth, life and death forever changed all of creation.  Where we once had nothing, we now have hope.  Thank you, Jesus!   (more…)

From The Ashes

John 2:19  Jesus answered and said to them, “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.”


“Our God” by Chris Tomlin (with lyrics)

If you have been watching the news lately, you have been bombarded with images of chaos in Baltimore.  It is no doubt disturbing, but where we see tragedy, the Lord sees opportunity.  Man’s garbage is the Lord’s treasure.  Where we see loss, the Lord sees potential gain.  In many parts of the world, farmers who are clearing new land, set it on fire.  They burn everything.  You see the ashes are a natural fertilizer.  From those ashes will spawn beautiful healthy crops.  That’s amazing isn’t it?  I love the way that God works.  Hallelujah!  In the wake of destruction, new life is wrought.  Praise God!  Let us not focus on the negative destruction.  Instead, let us focus on renewal.   (more…)

Twenty-One Martyrs For Christ

"Stoning of Saint Stephen" by Filippo Lauri

“Stoning of Saint Stephen” by Filippo Lauri, c. 1651. Saul in the extreme right (click to enlarge)

Acts 7:59-60  And they stoned Stephen as he was calling on God and saying, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

Twenty-one Egyptian men were recently beheaded for believing in Jesus Christ.  Twenty-one brothers in Christ were murdered for our Lord.  I tell you, I am overjoyed for them.  For what better way can one die than for the name of Jesus?  We should count these blessed men as heroes, for they are true martyrs for Christ Jesus. Hallelujah!  Praise God!  Amen!  My heart weeps for their families, for I know what it is to suffer the loss of loved ones to senseless violence.  My prayer is that they realize how special those twenty-one men are.  I pray they feel joy at the thought of those twenty-one beautiful souls frolicking with Jesus in heaven.  Theirs is a place of endearment in the heart of the Lord for there is no greater tribute than to lay down one’s life in the name of Jesus.  I would like you to take a moment to honor these twenty-one brothers.  Pray for their families and praise God for their sacrifice.  I want the enemies of Christ to know that you cannot kill a Christian, for our souls are eternal.  True believers in Christ shall never die.  The devil has convinced you that there is victory in the death of Christians.  He has lied to you.  Oh, there is victory alright; but it belongs to Jesus, not you. (more…)

Deborah Jacobs

deborahjacobsphotoThis interview is a very special one for me. It was an honor to interview one of my mentors. I have met a lot of good Christians during my journey. All of them have been very encouraging to me. I have known Deborah for over a year now. We met at the Kennebec County Jail in Augusta. As with all people I encounter, I was very skeptical of her at first. She did not recognize me at first and I did not tell her why I was in jail. It had been a year since I had turned myself in. So, many people in Augusta did not realize who I was. Eventually, Deborah and I built a great rapport and forged a real friendship. The more I got to know her, the more I realized what an amazing person she truly is. The Lord is truly working through her. You can see his hand in everything she does and yet she is so humble. She and some other volunteers have helped me to realize that there are truly good and wonderful people in this world. I cannot stress how important it is to an inmate (or any sinner for that matter) to see that there are truly good and kind people who love them because God loves them.


A Soldier Of Light

P1460184Acts 16:30-31  And he brought them out and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”  So they said, “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and your household.” (NKJV)

As Christians, it is our duty to be a light to those who live in darkness.  We are called to be witnesses; to testify about our Lord and His salvation.  It is an honor to be chosen to do so.  How precious is a child to it’s father?  We can’t even imagine what one soul is worth to our Father in Heaven.  There is no way to measure His love for us. When we are given a chance to help save one of the lost ones, we must rise to the occasion and do what we have been called to do.   (more…)

What God has cleansed…

cleanmeActs 11:9  But the voice answered me again from heaven, ‘What God has cleansed you must not call common.’ (NKJV)

I love this verse.  Often times I have thought of myself as unclean because of my past.  I once spoke to a minister about it and he showed me this verse.  I immediately realized that it was talking about me and everyone who is saved.   (more…)